It's been a week and a half since I've posted... I just can't think of what to post sometimes. I'm going through a high-stress period. I don't want to be negative or share anyone else's life-happenings even if they affect mine. Someone very close to us lost their baby right before the due-date just after Christmas and last week was about trying to relax and stay calm while supporting them as well.
We really got whammied the 10 days after Christmas: Christmas dinner at our house; the bad news I just shared above; New Year's; my 120th day of Pregnancy; and the funeral closed the week.
We had massages last Wednesday to try to prepare and relax so I'd be in a space that was good for the baby's soul on Thursday but I wasn't able to get comfortable and I just worried the whole time about being face down (even with the hole in the table), being too hot, etc. I also endured getting kicked for an hour while the curious baby inside me attempted to find out what the massage table was exactly. I actually hurt more now (especially my hips) from tensing up constantly and trying to hold myself in a position that didn't hurt... which hurt more. I'm kind of mad about it; not at the massage place but just at the experience. If Shawn hadn't enjoyed his massage I'd consider all that money wasted.
I think I'm just really overwhelmed; we don't have anything for the baby and my plans for a homebirth kind of just went down the drain yesterday--the midwife won't come to this state for quite a while--and I don't blame her. So it's like I'm halway done cooking this baby (pray for no preterm labor, which is my current obsession-fear) and just starting out preparing for it. I'm stressed.
The bright side: I (finally) successfully made booties...
AND
my friend & due-date partner Kim at Party Frosting! is having a little boy!!! YAY!
Wow...I feel so completely awful for the woman who lost her baby so close to her due date. I literally cannot imagine experiencing or recovering from that. I hope they have a lot of support and love right now.
ReplyDeleteI'm curious about the pregnancy massage. Did you talk to your doctor about it? I've heard mixed messages. The reason I ask is the place I get massages offers prenatal massaging and I just always wondered. But when I asked my masseuse there, she said they have women lie on their sides?
Finally, holy mole look at your belly!! You are officially pregnant (haha, like it just happened). Love the picture. Especially your foot tattoo (it is a tattoo, right?) peeking up at us.
@JustMe:
ReplyDeleteI know. It's just so. damn. sad.
They have a nice, loving family though and they are strong, lovely people.
The pregnancy massage on the side sounds better. I don't think once will cause any damage but I don't want another one.
Haha! I know! The invisible stage of pregnancy kind of sucks! It's like "I NEED to sit down but I just look like a lazy pile because I'm not showing." And yep, that's my tattoo :oD I like it in my belly pics, too!
Aw, hon, I am so sorry for all that you're going through, and my heart absolutely breaks for the family that lost their baby. I can't even imagine the pain they must be experiencing. Please let me know if there's anything I can do to help support you, because you know I'm always here for you! You have done an amazing job doing what's best for you and the baby, and I know you will continue to do so. Love and hugs to you, my dear friend!
ReplyDeletewow - some of my worst fears! Pregnancy is so scary, it's hard to stop and relish in the joy of it I swear! Good to know about the massage - sorry it didn't help :o( I am overdue for acupuncture session, so that is on my list this week, hopefully it brings me some peace!
ReplyDeletemany hugs!