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18 June 2012

How's ____-planning going?

All around me life is changing, moving, growing. People are getting married, moving, buying a home, waiting for their babies to be born. Our very own life is changing, too! But amidst the social discussion, I am left wanting to share with no one to oblige me.
"How's wedding planning?"
          "Did you pick a color for the kitchen?"
"Which OB are you seeing?"

None of these questions are for me. I am expected to pick one up that shoddily resembles an expression of my curiosity and pose it forth, another spectator aimlessly trying to increase the space between the clock hands before going back to my desk.

BUT, BUT, but I have NEWS, tooo!!!! Exciting NEWWWWWS!

"Yes, yes I do," I tell myself... "we're trying have a baby."
But the topic is so tip-toed around... if no one is there telling you all your reasons are wrong or that you're approaching it wrong way #2,041 of 1,000,000, they have nothing to say about this genuinely-awesome chunk of news.
I don't think they're disinterested in the fact that we are trying to have a child but I believe that they simply don't know what to ask or to say. Planned pregnancies in our social circle are not exactly an abundant occurrence either, so that adds to the weird-factor in discussions. So what do you ask someone who is trying to conceive? Anything you'd ask a newly-pregnant person.
  1. Do you have any names/colors/rooms picked out for future baby?
  2. Have you thought about where you'd like to have the baby?
  3. Have you found any cute things to buy yet?
  4. Are you trying for a boy or a girl?
  5. Do you plan to find out the sex?
  6. What month would the baby be born if you got pregnant this month?
  7. Is life changing already in preparation?
  8. What are you most excited/anticipating/scared to go through?
  9. Have you picked any preferences for diapers/sleeping arrangements/daycare?
  10. Are you preparing freezer meals before the baby arrives?
Obviously "How many months have you been trying?" isn't on the list; as I said, the topic is sensitive. Anything relating to infertility or difficulty should be avoided unless the other person brings up the issue. It's best to keep the questions general and positive to guage the mood of the conversation and encourage the TTC'er to share only as much as he or she is comfortable with.

Do you have any good questions to add to the list?
Leave them in the comments!

2 comments:

Jamie said...Reply to comment

I for one cannot WAIT to be Aunt Jamie :)

XOXO

HiLLjO said...Reply to comment

@Jamie Me too!!!! YEEEE!

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Thank you for coming by to read my experiences as a wife and what came before it, as well. My husband Shawn and I were married June 10, 2011 in Omaha, NE! I enjoy sharing my stories and hearing other people's stories so please feel free to share any in the comments (especially dress stories!). I LOVE comments!

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