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| My belly LAST week! |
I could go on about all the little changes happening; the little pinches, pops and twitches in my belly; or how I somehow received implants gradually over the course of the last 10 weeks and have no memory of it whatsoever. But instead I just want to put it out there: being pregnant... is WEIRD.
Some days I lay on my side, imagining the fruit-sized fetus inside me wriggling with life and its own heartbeat and I get as teary and excited as the first day I found out it was finally in there.
Other days I sit and feel the new pressure in my uterus, the sensations of what must be the baby rolling and turning in its small space only to get the sensation that I've been holding a snake and I'd like to put it-down-NOW. NOW. NOWNOWNOW. But I can't; I have to keep holding it.
Like I said: it's weird.
I also go from being very happy and excited for a few days, almost completely worry-free, and then I get overwhelmed and wonder if we did this at the right time. I also obsessively fear miscarrying and being in a car accident while pregnant every few days.
I blame hormones entirely. And lack of sleep.
Sleep is like something entirely new now. I sleep whenever and wherever I am able to do so for an hour or more. Sleep is also the 3-4 hour stints of rest I get at night between trips to the toilet and the pantry. I used to get so much sleep that I dreamed crazy pregnant dreams; now my sleep is so broken I haven't dreamed in almost a month.
Eating is still what my life revolves around. Every hour or two (sometimes 2 and a half) I must eat, or die... not really, but if I don't eat I'll puke and that hurts like I could be dying when my stomach is empty. This is why I not only visit the toilet in the wee (ha!) hours of the morning, but also the pantry: the baby bitch-slaps me with early morning (3:40 AM) hunger-induced nausea. What works the best and buys me the most time back asleep are my homemade oatmeal chocolate chip cookies.
The nausea I still have is almost always due to hunger. I have to be eating 2 hours after the last time I started to eat or else I'm asking to get sick. Yesterday I stayed on schedule and I still threw up, so who knows? As soon as I figure out my pattern I have a weird day or a new variable to toss into the mix, like sneezing. If I'm starting to get nauseous I sneeze. Sometimes the nausea goes away after I sneeze and sometimes it's a warning that puke is imminent.
Like I said: weird.
Pregnancy isn't at all anything that I thought it would be.
Stumble it!
7 comments:
Pregnancy is crazy, right?!
My friend said the same thing last years when she was pregnant with her twins. It is so interesting. Btw: you look adorable. Muah
Your baby bump is so, so adorable! Looking good mama, even if things feel a bit weird some days :)
I love your baby bump, Hill! You look great! Thanks, as always, for sharing honest accounts about pregnancy. Having as much knowledge as possible really helps me to prepare for when it's my turn. I feel like so many people just share the pretty pictures and happy stories, but not the honest truth about the weirdness.
LOVE this pic! You are so adorable and I am so glad all you shared - it's so true... being preggers is JUST WEIRD! Sneezing is a daily thing now and the hunger...whew, hard to keep calories in check when you want to eat all the time! and the worry is so true too! many hugs!
OMG I am so happy for you. (I'm a little late to the show...sorry). You. Look. Fabulous. Enjoy it to the fullest!
Best Wishes.
Hi...Can I just say, thanks for saying it out loud? Pregnancy IS weird (and I've never even experienced it). But I just imagine the same mix of joy and wonder and weird fear about having something living inside of you...ha! But yes, everyone is right, you do look cute! I'm going to starting Following your blog through your pregnancy :)
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